So we're at Craven a couple weekends ago, and if you've never been, lemme paraphrase for you:

Craven is a Huuuuge Gimmick fest. Everyone has something to try to lure people in to party with them, so that they can be known as "The Party Site"

*Some guys partied on the roof of their trailers.

*Some had school buses and home stereos that they'd blast at all hours (assholes).

*Some (our neighbours) had a pool

*Some had guitars and would serenade people walking by (we did).

Being the individual I am, I went for individual gimmicks: Moose Leather vest, Tye-dye Skynyrd T-shirt, aviator shades, and cowboy hat. I was a hot man.

And then there's the guys pictured. They had sprinkled chips on the street in front of their site, and surrounded them with lassos leading into their sites. The idea being, when a cute girl bends down for a chip, you lasso her and bring her in. That's pretty good, but the 3-foot-high sign was the coup de grace: it reads, in black spray paint, "FAT GIRLS: DON'T EAT THE CHIPS"

That's life advice, right there.

We damn near fell over laughing. So good!

The music: Alan Jackson was, in a word, spectacular. Randy Travis, Travis Tritt and Dan Seals all were highlights, and Big & Rich...well, as we determined Saturday night, they'd better find another bumper sticker to write a song about real quick.